Stable

I am stable

I am truly happy

I don’t count numbers

I don’t number my days

I am happy with who I am

But then why?…

Why does it sting

When you smile and tell me

“You’re fine, you’re stable”

Why do I want to be sick

When I am so happy?

Why does it hurt so intensely

When you tell me

“Yay! It looks like you gained”

Why am I not so happy

That I am stable

But I am happy…

I am just so confused

I yearn to understand

What is holding me back 

From everyone else’s happiness